"Chicago" found!

Exciting news!!! Dennis “Chicago” Kennedy is alive and well! I repeat, alive and well, so call of the search for his body!!

I saw Dennis in the parking lot at work last Friday, July 18^th, the day after the last BAB ride where he was a no show, as I previously reported. He was driving his wife’s Mustang convertible, again, dropping Lynn off at work, again. So, he didn’t try to take the engine out of her car and Lynn hadn’t “offed” him!! But why wasn’t he at the BAB ride then?

As I approached the car I told Dennis he was going to be flamed in the “Ride Report”! He told me it was too hot to ride, especially since he had heat exhaustion once before and never wanted to do that again. Since I have known of several people who actually have had heat exhaustion (I am sure Dennis did too!) and how dangerous it was I told Dennis he had a good excuse so I wouldn’t flame him.

Then Dennis laughed at me and told me that wasn’t the real reason he wasn’t there. The real reason was that he “just didn’t want to go, didn’t want to GO, it was just TOO DAMN HOT!!!” Lynn chimed in and confirmed that was the reason and that he was healthy and fine and the heat exhaustion thing was just a ruse and was not a good enough excuse and go ahead and flame him.

So, that confirms it!!! I believe that Dennis is, in fact, secretly training with the Olympic team and simply doesn’t want to tip his hand as to how superior of a mountain biker he is than the rest of us!!!

I am convinced that we will not see Dennis riding this year until he shows up at the Iceman race and smokes the rest of us!!! That or he will be selling his Iceman registration to Alex Zawinsky for a profit since Alex couldn’t follow the instructions for registering and didn’t get selected for this year’s race and is desperately trying to buy his way into the race!!

Sincerely,

Dan “Krash” Kiplinger

“Embedded” in-the-field Correspondent and Editor-in-Chief for the “Official Mountain Bike Ride Report”.